Hello everybody! Welcome to my column.
Each month I will draw a Major Arcana tarot card which represents one of many possible paths to follow. Major Arcana cards represent the archetypical themes of life, presenting the overall possible experiences.
Deck: Mermaid Tarot By Leeza Robertson Illustrations by Julie
Card: #13 Death
My, how Death becomes us. Death is a beautiful part of this ever-continuing cycle. In tarot, Death seems to have a lingering energetic pull of greatness. Have you ever heard the phrase, “things fall apart so better things can appear?” There is so much truth to this. Sure, sometimes when things end, it first feels as though nothing will ever make sense again. The fear of things changing can feel paralyzing; yet, at the very same time, the ending of something can be precisely what shoots us into moving forward.
When we discuss Death as an overall life path, it seems to bring about this idea of horrible implications. I want to “underline” the point that death happens in all aspects of our lives. Jobs, towns, partners, friends, crutches, vehicles, ideas, and so forth. It is about walking away from that which doesn’t serve us any longer. Literally anything and everything is affected by Death. With that being said, let us look at the need for the Death of our mental acuity-filled egos being in control. Ego being the driving force that navigates our every decision in life is precisely what can lead us into feeling disconnected, unstable, stuck, sad, lost, and overall ungrounded. The mental aspect of death is emphasized, especially in these columns, because when we stand in our own individual powers, when we stand up for ourselves and live by making choices that show how much love we have for ourselves, we make the decision to release the attachments with strength and with Grace. There is an ease that flows through this energy that gets stronger each time. Thus, a re-birth, if you will.
However, I would like to make exceptionally clear that the ego is not our enemy. It seems almost counterintuitive to view it this way, I know, but we can use it as a tool for navigating our personal alignment within the human experience. When we spend enough time in the dark crevices learning what doesn’t work for us we are able to appreciate and see what we do want. Death appears for us to bring forth exactly what we want. Our undivided attention to our hopes, dreams, and desires is suddenly birthed from this precise inspiration. A re-birth equals our power. It equals becoming someone we have never been before.
The thing with our minds and egos is that they will never actually “Die” they never go away, they never stop trying to do their job of keeping us “safe”, though sometimes it means they are working overtime in keeping us from living our truest selves. What we see moving forward is the idea of putting the Ego on “the back burner,” learning that it is possible for the voice to just become quieter, and can actually be molded into a beautifully merged balance that we lean on. We put in the practice of clearing our thoughts by acknowledging their presence, and then consciously deciding to ourselves that we will just refocus. When we watch them pass by without getting swooped up into the emotional response of them, we are able to see them from an outside view. We are able to look down at the thoughts and say, “Thank you, but no thanks” Then, sometimes shakily, we step forward into what feels right.
I personally have been dealing with Death in many ways. The one that stands at the top of the pyramid is fear. Fear of being wrong. Fear of being mocked, scrutinized, or berated, and even fear of the belief in myself. I think for me, the truest fear comes from delivering. Actually being able to deliver once I reach a new level. As I continue to get deeper into my business, and explore the expanded horizons set before me; receiving messages from the Divine in myriad of ways that continuously strongly encourage me to step into this new light meant for me, I retreat. I hide away from myself. I allow the doubt to set in that I will actually be able to deliver what is expected of me. Even as I see the confirmation from customers, friends, my own astonished, “oh my gosh!” moments in my day to day, in the quiet moments, I judge myself for my darkness. It is a big lesson for me to understand the merging of the two energies within, to see that the darkness is what fuels the strength of my lightness.
During a time of “Ego Death” we look to the understanding that when we feel the “birthing pains” of the new, it is absolutely okay. It is okay to be scared. It is okay to be nervous and even a bit doubtful, let us take a deep breath, and realize that just like a snake sheds its skin, the trees lose their leaves, the ground begins to harden, and the snow falls from the sky, we ourselves will still continue to evolve and flow with the changing energetic seasons, with one step at a time. Why do we do this? Why do we continue to stand up, to change, to allow the contrast to fade? Because it feels f***ing great when we do.
Comments